Sunday, July 31, 2011

Watch the video that the link leads to. rules make sence, I wish my parents didn't date in front of me, ther divorced only two months ago and they brought they're dates home a week after the divorce. I got no sleep that night, I just cried.


          Hello... I might sound completley and uterly stupid or I might make perfect sence to a lot of you but I'm going to be blogging about how hard it is for a kid to get through a parents divorce. I'm 11 and my parents recently got divorced, and trust me it's a lot harder than you think it is. When my parents were still together I didn't think much of how hard a parents divorce is hard on a child. My friend's parents have been divorced for about five years. I didn't think it was hard on her but one day (i know it wasn't polite of me) I read her diary. I thought to  myself, "What a wimp." But now some of the same words fill the pages of my diary. I am now going to stop this introduction and start my blog.

         The little things hurt the most. Like, when your dad's girlfriend or your mom's boyfriend sits in the front seat of the car and you have to sit in the back. You think, "Only me and my mom/dad can sit there!" Or, when they tell you what to do. Your not my mom/dad! I fell awful for my little brother. He is only 5 and he has trouble expressing himself. He gets punished for the way he expresses himself. When my dad's girlfriend asked him to do something, or not to do something, he says that he will only listen to my dad or my mom. I feel his pain. I wonder if he cries himself to sleep as often as I do. Tonight, before I made this blog I was sobbing over something stupid. It might just be because I'm tired but maybe it was resonable. My dad moved an hour away from where we used to live. My mom stayed in the area. When I'm with my dad I have to wake up very early to get to school on time. Tomorrow I'm going to my grandma's. We have to leave the house at 6:30. I am so sick and tired of staying up until four am sobbing and then having to wake up at six to get ready. I feel like sometimes I'm depressed. Like I hold it in all day then I unleash all my tears at night. I never show my emotions. I want to be the tough one. I act happy and ok all day but I'm not. I get in my bed and play sad music on my laptop. As I listen to Just a Dream and Temporary Home I cry and cry and cry until I feel like i'm out of tears and I go to sleep. My parents had me see a therapist but I hated her so I act okay so they don't make me see her anymore. I haven't seen her in months and I'm glad. She made me talk about my feelings and that made me cry. I don't like to cry around people. Sometines instead of being sad I'm angry and I throw huge fits. I yell things like "Go to Hell!" and "I hate you!" at my parents. Then I go in my room and curl up in a ball on my bed crying. I know that your thinking I'm insane and that I need to be in a mental hospital, but I'm quite sane. I play the violin, I'm in choir, honors math and science, drama club, and I've gotton a lead role in the play every year since third grade. I'm perfectly fine, and I know you are too. But if your parents are divorced you unbderstand me, and I understand you. If you have a question message me.